Sunday, September 30, 2018

MILWAUKEE-NYC-ITALY-GREECE AND A DAY IN LONDON BLOG POST TEN

THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM
We always try to put at least one new destination in our itinerary every time we travel abroad. This time there didn't seem like we had a lot of opportunities for squeezing in a new destination. What we decided on was once we got to Greece we'd add a day trip to an island wed never visited.
You can only do so much searching on Google for the perfect Greek Island before you hit the "fake news" aspects of doctored pictures and solicited reviews. We weren't sure what to believe so we threw a dart at the map and ended up with Tinos. The online pictures portrayed Tinos as another quaint and picturesque village. The truth of the matter is iPhone photography and chambers of commerce propaganda can be a bit deceiving.
We're also not geography geniuses especially when it comes the Greek Cyclades Islands. Turns out Tinos is an island and when we finally found a map we could understand it is actually a very large island by Greek Isle comparison with over fifty communities.
We were only going to the city of Tinos on the island of Tinos meaning that the beautiful pictures we had seen could have been taken anywhere on the island and not necessarily from in the town of Tinos. Live and learn.
The expression on the face of the desk clerk at our hotel should have told us something about our trip planning. We thought this could be a little jaunt not requiring a full day or a guide. I think he might have thought otherwise but was too reticent to hurt our feelings by telling us we might have miscalculated on our plans.
Baring his concern we signed up for a 1:15 Fast Boat with a return at 6:30. It only takes thirty minutes to get there by snail boat so we felt we were giving ourselves plenty of time to see a photogenic little village.
We had great weather for a boat ride. We arrived on time, got off the boat and hopped into a cab to the center of town, about a two-minute ride we probably could have walked.
The town consisted mainly of two major streets both leading up hill. We chose the one most likely to have the best shopping. Well shopping isn't really the thing in Tinos unless you're looking for a Greek Orthodox religious icon or a five-foot novena candle. You get the picture. If religion is your thing Tinos is the destination for you.
We decided on grabbing lunch instead and it was the best part of our journey.
We now know the rules of restaurant selection when on a Greek Island. Never choose one located on a main street. It's a better choice to pick the side street versions where locals dine and this is what we did in Tinos.
That's how we ended up at Zeuki on a side street with just enough room for a couple of tables and a path for single-file travelers to pass through.
We ate light. You might not think so. We kept mostly to appetizers and everything was delicious. We started with Tinos wild artichokes marinated in olive oil and topped with fresh pepper and kalamata olives and capers.
Then we shared a plate of deep-fried tomato and zucchini balls
and an omelet stuffed with typical Tinos sausages spiced with wine and fennel seed and a melted coating of local cheeses
Our final plate of fried smelt were to be consumed whole, head and eyeballs included. This was the one thing Emmy said she was willing to try but only with her eyes closed. One bite and that was it. Rick ate most of them but the plate did go back half full.
After that indulgence we were ready for some shopping, another faux pas on our part. The stores in Tinos close for the afternoon and don't reopen until around six in the evening. Had we known that we might have shopped first and eaten later.
So what do you do if you can't shop?
First you climb the hill to the top. Don't ask why, but up we went to the church of Panagia Evangelistriia.
It explained a lot about the religious significance of Tinos. Architecturally it was very beautiful and very grand with magnificent stairways exposing views of fountains and dramatic vignettes at unexpected turns.
Serene courtyards with intricate tile floors and sculptural fountains dotted the complex.
Colonnades with robin's egg blue vaulted ceilings arched over the exterior paths leading to mysterious doorways all making for a very magical architectural journey as long as you didn't get sucked into the sanctuaries with the lit candles in hopes of granted prayers.
Well that took up a portion of an hour. With all the stores that weren't selling religious items closed we had no choice but to eat and drink until our boat was ready to sail.
We found a water's edge café that served Rick's new drink of choice: a Aperol spritz and Emmy and I had cappuccinos that we drew out for as long as we could.
In Tinos there is an annual pilgrimage where hundreds of worshippers crawl on their hands and knees up the 2,600 foot hill from our cafes vantage point to the church as a sign of their devotion. We had the time to watch an elderly woman make it up to the top. We had a lot of time to spare.
To top out the day our boat was an hour late and when we got back to Mykonos there were no cabs extending our return another hour and a half. Tinos tired us out. We should have lit one of those candles and prayed to have god call us a cab or a car service.

Friday, September 28, 2018

MILWAUKEE-NYC-ITALY-GREECE AND A DAY IN LONDON BLOG POST NINE

AN INAUSPICIOUS ARRIVAL IN MYKONOS
When we as a family begin our vacation planning most of the arrangement drudgery is delegated to my work agenda mostly by default. I'm the one in charge of flights, hotels, transfers, passport updates, seat selections, museum visits and where the closest bathrooms are to all our destinations. One exception is usually food. This normally falls into Rick's domain, cuisine is his forte and he'll spend hours pouring over restaurant reviews until he's found the best places to eat in the most remote locations of our trips. This time he decided to get involved in a selection that would normally fall under my obsessive control anal planning. I am so anal I prepare and update a finite schedule for every trip we take with all the updates and additions and then pass them out to my traveling companions as the bible for our trip. This time Rick wanted to carry some of the heavy lifting and suggested that I let him pick one of our hotels.
He chose Mykonos. We let him.
He had enough free stays on his hotels.com site to make a hotel selection seem even cheaper than its listed price once he applied his credits. This was his raison d'ĂȘtre for being allowed to secure the one hotel reservation. He spent hours looking at new locations, prioritizing them in first choice to fifth choice lists until one seemed to rise to the top.

He showed us some general pictures and both Emmy and I agreed his final choice looked fine, better than fine actually.  That's how we ended up at the Elysium.
What we failed to see was that The Elysium wasn't the full name of the hotel. The complete name of the hotel on the Hotels.com website is, get this, Elysium Hotel - Caters to Gays.
Now this shouldn't have upset us since we're gay but we weren't too sure of Emmy's comfort level. It's one thing to go to a hotel like this with your partner but maybe not so much with your parents. Now Emmy has plenty of gay friends so with a substantial eye-roll she acquiesced.
For starts our adventure to Mykonos started with a miscalculated error by the hotel's part switching our arrival time with our Rome departure time. No car, no person holding a sign with our name on it showed up at the airport at the correct time leaving us stranded in the hot Aegean sun. Several hours later a car was finally arranged to pick us up and we were off to the hotel with too much time to think about and then worry about what we had committed ourselves to.
As our driver pulled into the entrance to the hotel we all let out a collective shy of relief. The exterior looked inviting, respectable and not at all intimidating.
But once inside Emmy's eyes started to pop and the fear factor came pounding back in. Rick and I looked at each other and the "Uh, Oh" moment hit us both simultaneously.
From the pictures on the walls and furniture in the lobby, although interior designer perfect, left no doubt about the "Caters to Gays" tagline on the hotels name plate.
The people behind the desk couldn't have been more gracious as they summoned help to get our luggage to our room and apologized for the snafu at the airport.
They also upgraded us to a two-bedroom suite so Emmy could have her own room.
As with the rest of the hotel the rooms were a stunningly white-on-white design scheme.
It was the abundance of all the nude male artwork on the walls giving the room color but draining the color out of us.
Nothing is more uncomfortable than dealing with sex and your children. We've always been very open about sex with our daughter but that's always in the abstract and in terms of advice about its beauty and how we want it to be guiltless yet responsible for her. This did not entail the in-your-face moment like the one we were experiencing as we walked into our room.
Rick took on the guilty parent role and immediately began looking up alternate hotels still available in Mykonos. Emmy just went into her room cringing.
We didn't unpack while Rick frantically made a reservation at the first hotel that could fit us in. What we should have done is take a deep breath and let the hotel work its magic, because no sooner had we made the new reservation then Emmy came out of her room having adjusted to the art and said, "I think I can handle this"
We ended up staying but with rules.
The pool would only see us sitting in the bathing suits required section with our suits on as opposed to the "optional" up top overlooking the pool.  This for us was never an option in the first place.
We were not to try to introduce her to any people her own age. If she wanted to meet any people she'd do it on her own.
We were definitely not allowed to flirt with any of the staff although being of certain age that possibility had sailed. We might go so far in the staff's estimation to qualify as potential sugar daddies but they'd soon find out we don't have the money to qualify,
and we couldn't wear anything more revealing than a mid-thigh anything anywhere. Speedos were beyond us at our age any way.
The last most important rule: we were not to embarrass her in any way, shape or form or she'd find the nearest exit and boat back to Italy
What we found out was the hotel clientele was anything but exclusively gay after all their signature is "The STR8 Friendly Hotel".
The food was delicious,
and the pool was not as intimidating as we first thought.
By the end of our stay we even took in the evening drag show and dinner.

Not so bad after all.